the last lap!

yes.. it's the last lap before the clock strikes 6.
im really tired from all the computer staring. yes.. literally staring.
had been trying to look for enrichment courses the whole entire afternoon since i decided to make myself more usefull than just sitting there and fighting slp once aagin.
it was a difficult attempt finding workshops mainly for camp.
i guess we should head towards more of self developement workshops, which once again, they're indeed not too easy to find. and those 'findable' ones are those that are priced at least 500 bucks and above. i mean, looking at my financial ability now, i don't think i will attempt to want to afford all these.

my parents are waiting impatiently for my pay. sigh. wads new. they're forever waiting for my money. as in, my money, they're not mine. they're theirs. im not complaining here. seriously, i will give whatever i can to my parents. at least thats something iwont be pissed off or complain over. but... sometimes, it just gets me really tired. having to learn to manage my finances only at age of 22, it's defiintely not easy. i'm too used to spending money. saving money is like a stranger to me. im' trying, trying, trying!
but all the time, it's hard to save when all mum does is ask for more, more and more.
im not sure if shes realising it. but im giving alot of money to her. whenever i can. it's okie to think that kids should give money to parents, but perhaps it's not fine if she thinks im PRODUCING money instead of earning it.
sigh. it's always depressing thinking about it. but lazing around here simply makes me think more than usual.

was blog reading the whole afternoon as well.
i really think relationships is an interesting thing.
nice to start, sweet to have, but most of the time, sadness and arguments definitely tag along.
sometimes i don't understand why would ppl want to try again and again. WOuld this help to increase the hardness of the walls that prevent us from getting hurt?
im not sure. i see ppl dying to be the someone. classic example, u know la huh. i really think it's not a smart move in life. but of course, it depends on ur priorities in life. once again, we're his options and shes the priority. oh well. so be it.
but i always believed that we need to strike a balance in our lives. because, at the end of the day, we have something to fall back on.
just like me. i had my friends, i had my work, i had qss. that kept me moving on.

whether i've really moved on. i asked, i wondered, i pondered. but all in all, i've decided to not bother. who cares. even if i think, im not sure if im gonna get an answer. i guess we'll really know it until the another someone comes along in my path.
it's better not to hold on to any hope for anyone. i feel. this made me confused a little while. but i guess it's just a transition period. just passing clouds. it'll be over soon. =)

so gracey shall be a happy girl all over again. its perhaps hard to understand wad the heck im saying. but who cares, it's for myself to see and understand.

valentine's day's coming. i read it on janice's blog. who cares abt vday? when everyday feels like vday. =) thats so sweeeeeeeeeeeeet. im happy to see happy couples around. but of course, i salute this couple cuz theyre going really strong. 3 years of aussie for janice, who knew, when shes finally completing her studies and returning to homeland. Bf leaves for queensland to study. another 3 years. i asked myself, will i survive? NO. i wont.
hang in there. cuz at the end these 6 years, the fruit of labour will be the most rewarding. =)

rights. finally. i've successfully wasted 15 min and its time for off-tp. =)

cya!