i wonder...

so weird.

just heard from colleague that shes got herself a new bf...
wow. shes like damn happy can.
haha... i can see all the smiles all over her face every new day.
she barely knew him for like.. 1 month plus.
it's always liek the sweetness of honeymoon period.
i hope all turn out fine. =)

i thought i'm over it la.
sigh. getting damn paranoid over everything im doing.
endless amount of time taken up for thinking if im like feeling right.
im not even sure myself.
think im getting a little retarded soemtimes....

it's hard to differentiate the thin line of just being friends.. or being more than friends.
whether the feeling is just nice as a friend.. or too much to be normal friends.
i don't get it at all.
had been reading other ppl's blogs recently.
read all kinds of philosophies on love, relationships, and PR.
but that didn't help in processing my little brain
to work faster for an answer.

i wonder if im thinking too much.
or dwelling too deep into things and actions.
and even words.
i thought i was right, but the fact turned out otherwise.
i thought im over something that im damn pissed with, but im not.
cant stand that big heart of mine.
everytime i start thinking... it shrinks itself to the size of a saseme seed.
no room for negotiation, no room for any positive thinking.

i also don't know why am i thinking so much.
as though i have nothing better to do.
these thoughts basically bring me thru the days of working life.
i thought my heart'll be peaceful after 2 weeks
but im not. everytime i go near that sensitive portion
it starts to flutter all over.
i don't know. it's weird.
tell me that im normal.

haha. sigh.
laughing and sighing at the same time.
wad do i want man.

confused.

shall just go for dinner with qingyuan.
and be a happy person.
to hell with any affairs of the heart. or even ppl that make my heart weaker day by day.

bye