So many things...

well. it sucks to be typing another blog just 20 min after typing one..

see. im seriously thinking alot.
so much so that sometimes.. i do not know which are the ones i'd want to put it in here..
and which are the ones that i'd still rem at the end of the day..

just read charm's blog.
i always have many thoughts rising up after i read her entries.
well.
i do agree that it's damn tiring not being myself when im ard with ppl..
esp in terms of r/s. always trying so hard to make up to the fact of being the perfect gf in the bf's eyes...
looking back. guess it was really a foolish act.
of course, i'll not deny that the lovey dovey feeling would make someone willingly do so.
but at the end of the day, what do we get in return?
it's usually not quite like wad we wanted or hoped for.

after every r/s, we learn things.
and i believe ppl grow up thru all these lessons learnt.
well.. i think before we can be ourselves in that very impt person in each of our lives,
we gotta find ourselves first.
what kinda person i really am? and which side is the real me?
sometimes im not even sure of myself.

i hope to find one that's able to accept me for who i am.
for my bad temper, impatience, grumpy episodes, and yes.. my emo states.
of course, i do have good points too okie.
just that most of the time.. the bad ones seemed to be most prominent. =p
but i do not want one that's always trying to hard to compromis and accomodate.
efforts are seen. but thats not wad i want at all.
accepting does not mean tolerance and compromising.
it means.. knowing me so well and able to tell me wads right and wrong at times.
so that we both grow. and i learn.
blah.

am i talking nonsense?
maybe i am.
cuz my eyes are really hurting.
i want my bed and my pillow and my blanket.
i want to close my eyes and not think about anything.
iwa nt my brain to rest, as well as my eyes.

OH! side track.
my boss and colleagues are thinking of having a ktv and drinking night.
HAHA. lame ppl. they simply make me go giggling away in the midst of a busy day.
i love them. just these few in that workplace to be precise.

gdnight. really slping.
i promise. =)