how?

tell me how. i no longe rhave anymore strength to implement anything else already. i was harsh, i was soft, i was patient, i was blunt. is the committee going to learn or not? or one ear in, one ear out. feels like it. it sucks when we have heavy responsibilities. im getting really disappoibnted. wadever ive said, i believe i've made it clear enough of wad are the expectations. if some still are unwilling to try, wad can i do.

after work today i went back to sch. whilst mic they all were discussing proj, i took a break and sat down on the floor with zhiwei and sister. reminded me of oltc while we just sat wherever we wanted. then, i fell aslp after i lied on the floor. for 45 min. it was, perhaps the most peaceful and quiet session i've had over the past few wks. peaceful because prob i felt tt there were ppl around me. sleepless nights when i was alone in the dark in the room, was unbearable, cuz i jsut couldnt get myself to slp until lik eperhaps half an hr or 1 hr later.

i asked myself repeatedly. Is it my fault that things turned out like that? perhaps i dun ahve a sense of leadership. i duno where to direct the club to. i've no idea of wad i want of the club when all along, i thot i had. deb said it's life that ppl keep disappoibnting us, but why is this happening?

so i do have attitude problem? i dun have my ap for no reasons sometimes. can we all, be matured enough to sit down and reflect why are such comments given to us by not just one person, but by a group of people? well, i've ap, but im not unreasonable. wheres our center of focus when it comes to reflecting? ourselves pls, instead of pin pointing at other ppl's faults first. thats wad i think one should do.

YAY. it's weekend again. though it's yet another tiring and hazy night. happy mooncake festival too. a night of celebration, yet it's my most peaceful night of slp i guess. it's been a week. and tmr gotta go back to sch to do project assignments. they're seriously stressing me out big time. and after tt i'll be going to work. sunday night too. im crazy. haha.

alright. i guess getting myself occupied is th best solution now. cant be bothered to thikn of anythig else already xcan~~~ im so tired!